Mine

FOOD HAS NOTHING TO DO WITH THE HEART

A woman makes her merry way into a poor guy’s heart or rather breezes into it without lifting a finger. It is only after the initial euphoria of love has died down that she needs the help of other traits to ensure that her position in her man’s life is not threatened and she can rule over his heart indefinitely. Man is a very simple and predictable species. He can survive on love and fresh air for the initial few years of his marriage.

With the advent of kids and a few other minor hiccups he wakes up from his kumbhkarani slumber and suddenly develops taste buds and an attitude to match. He comes out of his cocoon and demands his basic rights of good food and more of good food. The poor lady of the house is stunned for had she not been making the same soggy rice, lumpy dal, and half burnt chapattis for her man for the past few years? Then how come he suddenly develops taste buds and refuses to eat the healthy nutritious fare she prepares. She is flabbergasted and dumbfounded for hadn’t she housebroken and brainwashed her man to be a man and eat up without complaints. Her favorite lines being “Don’t leave anything in your plate there are thousands starving in Ethiopia.” His prompt reply nowadays is “Parcel this food to them and see how fast it is returned”.

To keep the peace in the house she tries to pacify her man and spends a little more time in the kitchen and cuts down on her television viewing. The results are outstanding. The chapattis are edible so are the dal and vegetables. But every action has an equal and opposite reaction hence his midriff starts expanding and love handles become more pronounced. He gains weight and needs to lose it quickly before annual medicals. Immediately starts the cycle of exercise and diet control.

The wife unlearns the puris and the parathas and starts cooking low fat curries and soups. He is grateful for the same and professes to love her more each passing day. So all I can say is, the way to a man’s heart may not be through his stomach but once you have possession of his heart, safeguarding it becomes your privileged duty.

Lucks aka Sulekha

18 thoughts on “FOOD HAS NOTHING TO DO WITH THE HEART

  1. "Haha – I love the Kumbhakarni sleep! And Su..a common trait with bong men – they will compare every meal that u cook for them evey day of ur life to the ones his mom did"!!

    Sukanya's comment, via LC

  2. lolol I loved this… I will agree that no meal is ever as good as your moms.. especially when she has been gone for years, the memory improves what we like and damns what we don't ( like first marriages lol)
    In my family this was settled before we were very old my mother & grandmother taught the older sons how to cook. I have been the cook throughout our marriage. I cook my wife cleans.. I get the best of that deal lol. I tell people that I when we first married I told my wife to pick two rooms in the house she wanted me to excel in. She picked the kitchen as one. I wont say what her second one was but I she owns the tool box and I seldom ever in the tool shed 🙂
    Great Post Thank You
    http://jpweddingphotograpy.blogspot.com/

  3. @Jim, What is with you guys and your mums!! You have a nice arrangement at home but mine is better, He cooks and He cleans 🙂

  4. IF I AM NOT WRONG THERE IS A PROVERB 'IF YOU WANT TO ENTER ANY BODY'S MIND,ROUTE THROUGH HIS STOMACH'. NOTHING WRONG ISN'T IT? I AM A FOOD LOVER. BUT SULEKHA HOW COULD YOU OPINED SO NEAR TRUTH ABOUT BONG MEN? ANY EXPERIENCE?

  5. @Jessica, thank you.

    @Roy, Easy on the biscuits and gravy…thanks.

    @Nirupam, it was my friend, Sukanya who mentioned Bong men, but I think all men prefer their mother's cooking. Thanks for the comment.

  6. Fantastic and true Sulekha! Years of staying together makes men in marriage so comfortable that love takes a back seat and finding faults, the front. But love is there nevertheless. It takes a few martial art kicks and Thai boxes to bring it back to the front seat 😉

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