Clothes have a tendency to retain the perfume even after a wash. The gown you had worn to the dance reeks of your Hugo Boss woman perfume, post wash. My son’s school uniforms scream Axe doespray. My Dad’s shirt has his smell,the woodsy,brylcreemy smell. I had bought a shirt for him on Nov 17th 2009 from ‘Cottons’ in Bandra, Mumbai. I hadn’t known then that it was going to be my last gift to him. It’s a white shirt with little blue flowers,Dad had loved the shirt.
On 8th Jan 2010, he had wanted to wear this shirt but it had gone for a wash. I think he knew he was leaving this world and going away from us all. My sister-in-law, Jyoti, tells me that he had been very upset when he was told that the shirt was still wet. My nieces, Kavya and Diya, had been playing Bob Marley’s song,”Don’t Worry Be Happy’ on the computer and Dad Had been enjoying this number. All those who were lucky enough to be near him in his last few moments, share their memories with me. I just listen and try to recollect my last memory of him.
It was on Nov 22nd 2009, that I had seen him smiling and wishing me good luck for the last time. I had been on my way to the airport to come to Delhi. I remember him giving me a sweet hug, he had lost a lot of weight but his hugs were still the same. I don’t really remember whether he had come down to the car or said goodbye from the 3rd floor balcony. Had I known that it was the last time I would be meeting him, I would have told him that I loved him a lot. He was my number one Man. The only person in this world who I could depend on, who would do anything for me, anything. I had so much faith in him,to get me the Moon even ,if I asked for it. He was my own fairy Godfather. Ever since he has gone away, I am an ordinary person without any special powers.
I have his shirt with me though and it smells of my Dad’s brylcreem and deo and his special daddy smell. I can feel t he is close when I hold it in my hands. How do I bottle this fragrance? How do I keep it smelling sweetly of him, forever?
by
Lucks aka Sulekha
<3 You hold it in your memories. <3 I have my dads shirt still, he died 22 yrs. ago. When I put my nose to it I can still smell his pipe, his hair cream and Old Spice all mixed, the daddy fragrance I call it.<3
Does the heart ever heal, Jan? I can't imagine not missing him, you miss him even after 22 years. Thanks for the visit and comment.
Does the heart ever heal, Jan? I can’t imagine not missing him, you miss him even after 22 years. Thanks for the visit and comment.
How true this is… My experience has been when I travel back to the US from India … my boys always get a whiff from the suitcase… instantly they say " The smell of India is like no other"
Savira,Your boys are lucky, they get to see you and get a whiff from the suitcase of their home too. I treasure the shirt and take it out on special days, just to get him back in my memory. Thank you for your comment and visit.
Love is stronger than death even though it can't stop death from happening, but no matter how hard death tries it can't separate people from love. It can't take away our memories either. In the end, life is stronger than death.
I can understand how you feel..Sulekha,just take care of yourself.
Alpana, Death cannot separate people from love but it takes people away from those who love them and it hurts a lot. Thank you for understanding, I am sorry for your loss too.
hold the fragrance in your memories, let them linger in there forever…………
Arvinder, holding on tight…thank you for visiting and for your lovely comment.
I'm so sorry for your loss. We never know when it will be the last time that is why we must always live each day like it's our last. That way the love you's never go unsaid, the hugs and kisses are sweeter, and the memories never fade from happy to sad ones. xoxo
Jenni, I try to live like that now, I am more forgiving, loving and generous in my behavior towards those I care for. Thank you for visiting and leaving such a sweet comment.
I'm so sorry for your loss. We never know when it will be the last time that is why we must always live each day like it's our last. That way the love you's never go unsaid, the hugs and kisses are sweeter, and the memories never fade from happy to sad ones. His presence will always be with you. You have a good memory in the smell of his shirt. I would love to have something like that to smell and hold to keep my loved ones close. xoxo
Love has its lasting effects and it's a beautiful metaphor for that perfume with lasting fragrance :)…just keep remembering…
I love this Sulekha 🙂 I embrace your thoughts of your dad 😉
Melissa, Thank you for embracing my thoughts about my Dad. Love lingers on even after our loved ones have left. Thanks a ton for coming here , god bless.
Oh my darling Lucks, he's there with you all the time, like that scent you cant bottle but can smell, he's there, only you cant see him! hugs to you…
Swati, thank you for your loving hugs and caring comments.
Smell and memories are always connected. Sometimes the smell itself gets imprinted in our memory. I lost my father when I was 13. Seems like a very long time now.
Memories will sustain you dear Sulekkha.
Joy always,
Susan
Susan, so sorry for your loss, I know how much it hurts. Memories are the only things left when we lose our loved ones. Thank you for visiting my site and sharing your feelings.
I can so relate to this. The only consolation was that I was with my mom till she breathed her last…but, her things, they are still around the house. It took me two years to just pack up her sarees and give it to women's orphanage…took lot of strength to do it.
Even now, when I open the cupboard which has here silk and kancheevarma sarees, each and every saree has a memory attached to it.
Hugs.
Janaki, welcome to my website and thank you for your comment. I am sorry for your loss. The memories never leave us and neither does the heart ache, but that's life and we have to grin and bear. Appreciate your sensitive comment.
Dear Sulekha,
You have already bottled that fatherly fragrance in the vial of your heart.It will continue to fill you with blessings.
-PORTIA
Portia, Thank you for visiting and leaving such a beautiful comment on my post. Love what you have written here, thanks.
Dear Sulekha,
You havealready bottled that fatherly fragrance in the vial of your heart and it will continue to fill you with blessings.
-PORTIA
Smell is a memory as is music for me. I feel for your loss but is it? Your memories and love live on.
A
Alejandro, Yes they do live on but some days we want them around, in person. Thank you for your sensitive comment.
Sulekha, this post hits me at home. I lost my adoptive dad in 2002 and even though I don't have one of his shirts, if I close my eyes I can conjure up his smell. He loved to work on cars and be outside, so he smelled like motor oil, grass and sunshine. Your father's eyes hold much love and light. I am sure he is smiling on you now. Happy Holidays my dear!
http://lyricfire.typepad.com/lyric-fire/2011/11/l…
Tameka, I am sorry to hear about your father. Why does life have to be so unfeeling at times? Dads have their own special daddy smells and memories keep them fresh in our minds for years to come. You noticed my dad's eyes too, thank you for the same.
Sulekha, this post hits me at home. I lost my adoptive dad in 2002 and even though I don't have one of his shirts, if I close my eyes I can conjure up his smell. He loved to work on cars and be outside, so he smelled like motor oil, grass and sunshine. Your father's eyes hold much love and light. I am sure he is smiling on you now. Happy Holidays my dear!
http://lyricfire.typepad.com/lyric-fire/2011/11/l…
Lucks when i see your picture i see your smile your dad's smile, when i read your post i hear your dad's voice. i lost my dad in 2000 and today is my brother's birthday he past in 2008, my sister in 1963, my grand dad in 1963 my grand mother in 1973. but i have all of them with me every moment, you have your dad with you, look in the mirror see your dad smile listen to your voice hear him speak through you. look into your heart see his love is there. god bless daddy girl
Roy, We all have lost loved ones at some point in our lives and the pain never goes away. Sorry for your loss and thank you for reminding me about how I resemble my dear Dad. Our smiles are kind of same 🙂 Your comment touched my heart, thank you.
Such a touching narrative Sulekha. It kind of tears one apart. God bless you for having the ability to snare such a powerful emotion in such a lucid style. May his soul rest in peace.
Ayon
Ayon, Thank you for your sensitive comment. Somehow 22 November marks the end of all things happy and good because he stopped breathing on this day and went so far away that no matter what I try, I can't bring him back . He was so proud of my writing and would have been thrilled to see my articles and website, I am sure he is watching and blessing me as always. Thanks friend, god bless.
O! This is soo nostalgic…..remembering him even fter 22 yrs n ths post shows how small n imp things matter soo much…his shirt….his hug….his smile….O mine!!
May wherever he is…he is happy…n smiling when he sees u frm there sulekha!!
God Bless!
Love
Mani
Manisha, Thank you for your visit and kind comment on my post. I sure hope that he is proud of me and is smiling from up there, thanks.
O! This is soo nostalgic…..remembering him even fter 22 yrs n ths post shows how small n imp things matter soo much…his shirt….his hug….his smile….O mine!!
May wherever he is…he is happy…n smiling when he sees u frm there sulekha!!
I remember also holding on to my dad's shirt and smelling him in them. I would hold on to it and imagine snuggling up to him like I used to. But with time the smells go but your memories still remain alive in your heart and that is what you will do the same and remember him
Rimly, So sorry for your loss Outlier. We keep remembering them and try and keep all the good times alive in our hearts and minds. It's very tough but we survive, thanks for understanding.
Oh Sulekha, You have captured the smell of your dad’s shirt, the essence of scent that was uniquely his: the woodsy, Brycreemy fragrance.
Even though you didn’t voice your sentiments of love as much as you wish you had – had you known it was the last chance you’d get – somehow, I intuit that he already knew.
Oh Sulekha – You have captured the smell of your dad’s shirt, the essence of scent that was uniquely his: the woodsy, Brycreemy fragrance.
Even though you didn’t voice your sentiments of love as much as you wish you had – had you known it was the last chance you’d get – somehow, I intuit that he already knew.
Debra, welcome to my site and thank you for your touching comment on my post. I really hope he knew and I think he did too <3. Appreciate your thoughts.
Oh Sulekha – You have captured the smell of your dad’s shirt, the essence of scent that was uniquely his: the woodsy, Brycreemy fragrance.
Even though you didn’t voice your sentiments of love as much as you wish you had – had you known it was the last chance you’d get to tell him this – somehow, I intuit that he already knew.
Thank you so much Debra 🙂
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