Love marriage ya arranged marriage?                                                                                           https://www.facebook.com/LoveYaArrange

All marriages are arranged, some are fixed up by two people in love and others are arranged by people who love the two getting married. Love marriage is a partnership between two people who love each other and want to spend their lives together whereas arranged marriage is a partnership between two families who think that their children can live happily ever after.

It’s so difficult to decide between the two, both have their pros and cons. Love is a very volatile emotion and highly unstable too, one minute all is rosy and next minute it could become dark and ugly. Insanity and love go hand in hand,

“When love is not madness, it is not love.  ~Pedro Calderon de la Barca”

You fall in love and get married against your parents’ wishes and if you are lucky, you may live happily ever after but, things could go wrong in your relationship and you may end up hating each other. It’s a gamble we all take when we get married, either by choice or by our parents’ choice.

There have been arranged marriages which have collapsed within months of the wedding and I know of so many love marriages which endure the test of time and remain forever strong. Earlier, the elders used to decide who their children were supposed to get married to and they were not asked their opinion but were told what to do. My grandmother had not seen my grandfather until the wedding night.

Thankfully things are a lot different now and I know a few young professionals who have left it up to their parents’ to arrange a match for them. Their logic being, the parents know what they like and what kind of life partner they are looking for, lack of time is the reason cited for this turnaround.

This is a golden middle, wherein the parents’ choose the bride or groom for their child and get them together so that they can meet them and decide if they are suited. They don’t agree to get married right away but get to know the person they are thinking of spending their lives with, eat out, go for movies, talk and then make up their mind. Engagement period is considered the best time in a bride/grooms life.

My parents are a perfect example of an arranged cum love marriage; they celebrated their 50^th wedding anniversary in style. We witnessed their remarriage with all the festivities, touch wood.

Love ya arranged marriage, both are subject to your adaptability. Compromise is not a dirty word, but a very essential ingredient in the curry of marriage, be it love or arranged.

Sulekha Rawat