Mine

Nothingness #AtoZChallenge

Blogging From A to Z Challenge (April 2016)

The theme I’ve chosen for this year’s blogging challenge is ‘Travel’, and in keeping with my  theme I have taken you along on my trips to various places to date. Some of my travel destinations are inaccessible by air, land and water and an active imagination is what you need for going to these out of the world destinations. Today I am sharing a teardrop from my eyes ; a poem about our first day without Sparky, our beloved pet Dalmatian.

The alphabet of the day is ‘N’.

n

Writing is very cathartic for me. As a teacher, I hear many students say that writing can be painful and exhausting. It can be, but ultimately I believe that if you push through, the process is healing and exhilarating – Francesca Lia Block

 

Sparky Journey

I can’t bring myself to visit the

Green Park’s  coffee shop

Without breaking into a cold sweat

And fearing my heart will stop.

 

It is where we had halted

On our way back

From the crematorium

To delay going to a silent home

 

Three of us, alone

Empty handed and forlorn

Spent and lost

Heartbroken and distraught

 

My tears wouldn’t stop falling

My arms ached to hold my baby

I couldn’t believe she was no more

I wanted her to come back

 

My family feared my grief

Hid theirs to help me cope

Took me to a public place

Hoping to make my tears stop

 

I didn’t want to make a scene

So I pretended to be calm

They forced me to eat there

Knew I would refuse to at home

 

The few bites choked me

The juice burned my throat

My head wouldn’t stop spinning

My heart almost stopped beating

 

Sparky put her paw in my hand

Whispered in my ear

Mommy, you need to stop

These two are hurting too

 

I pretended to be fine

Even ate something, don’t know what

Hid my tears and tried to smile

I couldn’t be oblivious to their pain

 

We walked into an empty home

No barks of joy and love

No affectionate woofs

Sparky wasn’t there to greet us

 

It is difficult to come home

And not find her waiting by the door

Miss her excited tail wagging

Her gentle sloppy kisses

 

By Sulekha Rawat

9 thoughts on “Nothingness #AtoZChallenge

  1. Ohh dear Sulekha, so much pain in those words! I am sure Sparky would be missing you as much, your love and affection. No words can soothe or be enough to heal the gaping hole in your life but the biggest healer is of course time. With time you will get better, not forget but just that that the sadness and emptiness will dull down. Sparky would want her mum to be happy always I am sure, so stay strong. Your family needs you as much. Sending you hugs and cheers to keep smiling.

  2. I know how tough it is… people refuse to understand that this is not a pet. It is family. It is the most unconditional form of love many of us receive in our lives.
    Letting go is one of the hardest things we will ever have to do

  3. I have never had a pet, because I am scared of animals.

    But this poem revealed to me the extent of love that people-who-have-pets have for their beloved extensions of family. And when they’re gone.. it does feel like a family member has left, never to return.

    I hope you’re doing better now. It’s impossible to completely forget about Sparky, because she really was an integral part of your life. But I do hope that you remember the beautiful memories you spent with her and allow it to make you happy and smile again 🙂

    Hugs, and have a great weekend!

  4. Hugs, Sulekha. That was heartbreaking to read. I can’t even begin to imagine what it must have been like to deal with. Sparky is always with you in spirit and in your memories. In a way, I feel we all know Sparky through the beautiful stories you share.
    Much love!

  5. I feel your heart, Sulekha! While Time tries to heal, there’s always be a raw spot inside us that asks “why!” and trigger the tears. I am very much looking forward to your book about dear Sparky, who is smiling at you right now in your mind! Hugs!

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